Nothing leaves until it’s done with us. So you can’t move on too quickly, or let go too casually, or else IT will keep coming after you. The partner you left, the place you moved on from, the emotion you thought you were done with, the obstacle you were hoping to avoid, they will keep ... Continue Reading »
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19th century British author, Havelock Ellis, said All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on. This is to true. Yesterday we sent our oldest son off to College for his second year. We’re experienced at letting him go, but this year is different, seeing as we’re moving ... Continue Reading »
We had a yard sale last week. A grandmother bought a bunch of furniture from us as she had family moving in. She said she would be back to haul it away. We were surprised to see her turn up in a two door convertible and even more surprised when she crammed computer tables and ... Continue Reading »
So often, its only after you lose someone or something that you realize how important they are to you. Grief has so many ways of making this point; the nagging, empty feeling, the disorientation, the almost out of body aloneness. The great and wise philosopher Lemony Snicket said it best for me, It is a ... Continue Reading »
February 18th, 2013
The great and wise Einstein is said to have said, “Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.” This got me thinking about simplicity. Thinking about simplicity is a dangerous thing to do, and sure enough I over thought it and cut myself on Occam’s Razor. If you don’t know what Occam’s ... Continue Reading »
A healed memory is not a deleted memory. Instead, forgiving what we cannot forget creates a new way to remember. We change the memory of our past into a hope for our future. Lewis Smedes Become the master of your memories instead of letting memory control you. Ironically, it’s because we forget who we are ... Continue Reading »
George Michael was right. You do gotta have faith. But what is it? Why is it important? And how do you grow it like the proverbial mustard seed? Before we moved to America, I took a pilgrimage to the Mecca of extreme leisure in Queenstown, New Zealand, to do a Bungee jump. I did it ... Continue Reading »
Knock knock! Who’s there? Control freak. Now you say, “control freak who?” Too slow. Now laugh. And stop. Am I successfully remote controlling you? Alright, I confess. I’m a control freak. My family don’t call me “key man” because I collect keys. I like to be in the driver’s seat, can’t stand being a passenger. ... Continue Reading »
Inner peace? We all want it, and we want it now. So how do you get it? Nobody can give you inner peace. You have to find it yourself. Its not even something you find. You just have to stop burying it. It is your own thoughts that are denying you this innate experience. It ... Continue Reading »
Zig Ziglar said, “Every obnoxious act is a cry for help.” Wow! What an amazing way to reframe being attacked. It’s not easy, mind you, in the heat of the moment. But imagine how different life would be if we lived with that sort of compassion. About twenty five years ago, I was physically attacked ... Continue Reading »
You can’t change what happened in the past. It’s all water under the bridge flowing in a sea of memory. You can build a bridge in your mind, from memory to meaning. Choose how much power you give the past, and what you make it mean about who you are. From this perspective, the view ... Continue Reading »
Kindness is the master key that opens every heart. If you are fumbling for the right words, like a late night search for keys, start with “I care”, “I understand” and “I’m here for you”. You will open the door to healing. Guarded hearts will be unlocked. Turn the key of kindness with words of ... Continue Reading »
My study is upstairs. Across from his room. His too busy with life room. Flung with rushing to the next thing room. The barely home room. Clothes too busy to pick up. A notice board with thick wads of paper, pay stubs and college forms. And then there is his music. His eclectic collection from ... Continue Reading »
Thoughts float in and out of your mind like feathers in the wind. Let them come. Let them go. Surrender worry like feathers. Release fear like feathers. Stop chasing thoughts and you will feel as light and free as a feather. Every thought you release is a feather in your cap, mastery of your mind.
I find myself reflective this Father’s Day as I prepare to send my oldest son off to College. How do you say goodbye to your own flesh and blood and send them out into the big bad world? My mind wanders through eighteen years of intimate connection. No wonder it’s hard to let go. I ... Continue Reading »