Is this normal? You know, to hide from your kids? I don’t mean the missing-in-action, type of hiding, where search parties scour muddy marshes. When everyone gives up looking, saying “oh well, we tried. She was nice enough, but watcha gonna do?” No I mean just a time-out. For me.
In the early days, the toilet was my only time-out. Call me mentally unstable (it’s not like I haven’t heard it before!) but the bathroom was my only sanctuary. I could shut the door, sit and breathe. No, not the freshest of air, but I would take any air over none at all. I find that mothers are good at hiding, in many ways. You may not all be crazy like me hide from your children in bathrooms, but ‘fess up ladies – we hide from each other, AND from ourselves!
Take for example the exasperated friend sharing troubles and strife, throwing arms up in surrender to her child’s bewildering tantrums. After knowing her for years I only now find out we share a common journey? Phew, her life isn’t just filled with organic vegetables, family yoga sessions, a plastic free kitchen, and everlasting patience. She does her best, but there are days she is simply buried. Just like me, and dare I say it- just like you.
You know that feeling of having fallen off the back of a truck, being run over it two or three times, then left to claw your way along a gravel road to the nearest friend who places the water of hope to your lips and revives your belief in the good of the world and that your children are not out to kill you? – Yeh, well guess what? I know that feeling too!
Mothers, come out come out wherever you are! Now I’m not suggesting we all run naked down the streets demanding better pay, more vacation days and sick leave. (One must be realistic) Nor do I suggest we leave the bathroom door open for all the world to see….but perhaps we could all meet in that space where you and I no longer need to hide in the shadows of what should be, but meet under the warm light of what is. A light just bright enough for me to see myself, in you. And you in me.