I’m not the funny one. Oh I can be funny even without a glass of chardonnay in hand. But I’m not the funny one. Put in me in a crowd and I’m rather silly if you catch me in the right mood, yes I’m may have heard a chuckle or two in my presence. It’s true; I can work a crowd on a good day. I enjoy a party, an audience, and even resort to laughing at myself just to get the ball rolling. But still, I’m not the funny one.
Somehow my jokes just don’t seem to translate at home. I used to pull it off, back when they were little. But now I crash, I forget the punch line, stumble over words and just I don’t seem believable anymore. They’re a tough crowd.
So now it’s him. He’s the funny one. He does his thing and they laugh. I don’t even know what he does, it’s his. I’ll watch, take notes and try it later. But I can’t do it, because it’s his. It’s a dad thing. Kids like goofy dads, all the moaning and eye rolling are just a part of their game. He’ll hum a funny way, say a silly word, doesn’t take a lot. He’s our light relief, our breathing space. I was just the warm-up act.
Perhaps I blew it when I started getting bossy. Telling them to clean bedrooms and do homework. There are too many jobs to do to be funny any more. Now I’m just mean and poor funny is merely a fleeting moment in my limited repertoire.
“Excuse me Funny, can you please move? I have to vacuum here. Funny, you’re in the way; I’m trying to cook dinner. No Funny I don’t have time for this, can’t you see we need to get to swimming lessons. Funny, just back off!”
I’m not entirely sure how, but over time Funny turned into Irritating. But now I want my Funny back and I will search until I find it! Perhaps it’s shivering in a dusty corner hoping not to be yelled at. Maybe it’s shoved under my bed with the other things I don’t have space for, or maybe it’s in the basement with the long forgotten ab-cruncher.
But I will guarantee you this. Just when I’ve searched high and low, exhausted all possibilities, stopped trying so hard to find it and finally let go, Funny will creep up behind me, poke me in the ribs, and laugh right in my face. I just hope I recognize Funny, and laugh right back.