I am in the midst of the absolute greatest love affair of my life. I am full of excitement, curiosity, love, contentment, joy, laughter, and trust. I find myself in anticipation and wonder at all this relationship holds for me to learn and experience. I feel myself growing more centered and more connected as each day goes on. I stand willing to take risks as I am supported and uplifted. I am inspired to learn, challenged to evolve, and encouraged to live to my potential. I have dreamed about this relationship my whole life and am beyond thrilled to have actually found it.
Sounds like the absolute perfect relationship right? I believe most would even say it is to good to be true. I sit here and write this with a huge grin on my face because it is perfection and it is true. I am utterly and completely in love….with me.
I think that most of us struggle throughout our lives with that voice we hear in our head. That voice that is constantly questioning, judging, criticizing, or finding ways to let us know that there is something wrong with us. The voice in my head was very subtle yet powerful. For years I had been extremely hard on myself, attempting to justify my every action, and feeling as though I was never good enough. I thought I loved and accepted the person that I was and am, but turns out I didn’t truly love myself at all.
True and authentic love is unconditional, based in acceptance and compassion. It doesn’t judge good or bad, right or wrong. It simply accepts that what is simply is, without reason or justification. Once I understood this I realized that everything about me, even the things that I had judged to be faults deserved gratitude. Every single part of me had contributed to my being the person that I am today. Even this idea of my being overly hard on myself has contributed greatly to my ability to sit here and write today.
In a beautiful and memorable moment I fell deeply in love with myself. I knew this type of love well, as it is the love that I have felt for my son since the moment I knew he existed. I had this overwhelming and all consuming feeling build throughout my being and realized rather quickly that it was all for me. I could not believe this was the first time I was feeling this. I felt giddy and excited and could not take the huge kool-aid smile off my face. I was head over heels in love!!
I sit here today knowing that this is only the beginning. What I know is that it all comes down to how I feel about me. Everything I put out into the universe is a reflection of what I am inside. This great love for myself automatically opens my heart to loving others in a true and authentic way. This amazing love expands my heart to encompass the universe. I have always wanted to live my life as far and wide as possible and this beautiful love affair now makes that desire achievable.