I Don’t Care

June 25th, 2015

blog- let itI like to think I am a caring person. But this, this is one thing i just do not care about. You can tell me about it a million times over, and again I will look you in the eye and say, I do not care. I actually have a bee in my bonnet about this. Well, I would if I wore a bonnet, and it would be more a hive than a single bee, but you get the point. Fair warning: I’m feeling a little narky about this for I am about to judge everyone who judges. And yes, I do see the irony.

I cannot count the times I’ve been having a coffee, shooting the breeze, or walking down the street with someone when all conversation stops for a clear and decisive moment of judgment. A moment of all-the- choices-I-have-ever-made-are-far-better-than-the-choices-that-this-unknown-person-is-making-today. A young woman with gaping big ear gauges may walk past, an obese older man needing assistance shuffles by, someone’s body is covered in tattoos, a mother feeding a toddler non-organic icecream before lunch, someone speaking too loudly, an unflattering skirt, top, shoes, hair tie, someone too short, tall or even a little too mousy. “oh, if only he would”, “I have no idea why anyone would….” …”did you see…?”

For some strange reason they seem to think I care what their opinion is. For some strange reason, people think their opinion about someone else is right. That they are living the right way, making the right choices and doing this living thing correctly.
Wake up call- you’re probably making choices they wouldn’t make
Wake up call- you don’t know jack shit about the obese man or the girl with the tattoo.

So, if the overweight lady wants to wear a canary yellow above the knee dress, it probably means she left home feeling pretty good, or maybe even just ok. It doesn’t warrant a discussion from strangers. Nor does the guy with a face tattoo, the nose ring, shaved head, or a couple of gay guys holding hands, frazzled mother with 6 kids, those shoes with that dress, or a guy holding a sign on a street corner asking for a couple of bucks.

Most people are just having a go at this whole living thing. Trying stuff out, doing their best, taking a chance and seeing what works to make them feel alive. They may be happy, they may be screwing it all up big time. If their living doesn’t fit with your living, have a chat with them and hear their story. If you don’t want to, then cross the road and go on your merry way. If their living scares you a little, threatens you, challenges you- oh I don’t know…..maybe take it as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and ask yourself why. This world is spinning on an axis of judgment, wouldn’t it be nice if we all just took a breath and whispered to ourselves “each to their own”? I have a tattoo, I’ll most likely get another. I probably won’t get it on my face. That’s just me. I don’t dye my hair so I look older than I am, that’s just me. I swear, eat as much organic food as possible yet inhale icecream by the truck load. What made me happy yesterday may not today, I am complicated, but that’s just me, and quite possibly you too.

Now, I’m no angel. Lest those who judge others be ………whatever……….let’s just say, I have my own fair share of opinions about people. But, I have found over the years the less I voice these opinions the less I think about other peoples choices. And now, I just really honestly don’t care what other people do, or how other people look.

And more to the point, I don’t care what you think about other people. The only thing I do care about is what you think about yourself. About how you feel about the way you are living your life, and I hope you go a damn site easier on yourself than you do on others. This world could use a little more compassion and starting with ourselves is as good a place as any. Wear that bright yellow dress, pierce your nose and eat a plate full of fries the size of your head if you want. Or don’t. Either way, your life, your choice and I promise I simply won’t care. After all, having all those opinions about other people is  exhausting! I may or may not be speaking words of wisdom but I say, let it be.

*Footnote : obviously if people are harming others by the choices they are making, you can bet I’ll have an opinion, and voice it, loudly.

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  1. Beverlee says:

    I LOVED this article, so perfectly put!!

  2. Sarah Waldin says:

    I.LOVE.THIS.thank you. xx 

  3. Audrey says:

    This is the best!

  4. Joyce says:

    AMEN MEG! I love this article & will try HARDER to live this way. 

  5. Anne LL says:

    Absolutely Meg!

  6. Petra says:

    As always – so beautifully worded….. Thank you. The footnote for me is very important though.  I am less likely to have a lot to say but would rather do….

  7. Rachel says:

    That is the beauty of getting older.

  8. Manfred Luck says:

    How we treat others is a good indication of how we treat ourselves.

  9. Karen says:

    Another seed planted, great blog Meg, thanks.

  10. Jo Guthrie says:

    Right on and thanks for that reminder!

  11. Great work! If we all spent more time improving ourselves and enjoying life, and less fretting over other peoples’ choices, we’d all be far better off. As you say, when choices impact others, different game entirely. I don’t count all “offense” as such an impact – see above….  

  12. Kel says:

    Meg – I love this article.  I wish I could read content such as this and immediately and completely live it.  These are wise words and they would make the world a better, more peaceful place, if everyone lived these words.  I struggle with being jealous of others more fortunate (in my perception) lives, despite the fact that I know it is foolish to be envious of others, since we all have struggles.  Thanks for sharing Meg.  I love your (and Ian’s) website! 

  13.   Bingo!John Otterbacher

  14. Harmony says:

    THIS WAS AMAZING. Thank you Meg. Live and let live judgement free!

  15. Sue says:

    Ha!  Don’t think this has anything to do with age, i.e. That is the beauty of getting older.   

  16. Sharon says:

    Great article 🙂  Thank you for sharing!  I just shared it!  Pretty much mirrors how I feel about life, and people.

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